Day 91: Epilogue

Today is all wrong. That just seems to be the best way to describe it. No jumps. No strength exercises. No measuring the food. No portion allotments. Nothing.

Although I was loathe to do so, I took a break from the PCP lifestyle due to much encouragement for the contrary. I guess the best way to think of is as another experiment in indulgences.

I hate it.

Last night I didn't pack my PCP lunch and snacks because there was going to be an all you can eat food fest (aka "Halloween Party") at work. That gave me quite a bit of extra time in the evening.

Normally I play with my j-rope in the morning. Not today. I had lots of free time to do—well—nothing. I felt very lost and drifting. I still had my PCP breakfast. I just couldn't take a break from the program for the whole day.

The "buffet table" at work was loaded with cakes, cookies, donuts, creamy-jello something, crab rangoons, full fat cheese, crackers, apple cider, and a tray of finger veggies. Pizza and wings was delivered for lunch.

So, what have I snacked on so far?

—Some swiss and munster cheese (about 7 pieces).
—One cracker.
—Two donut holes (a plain and a powdered).
—One mini-glazed donut.
—Two bites of a sugar donut. (The greasy flavor just got to me.)
—One mini-packet of peanut M&Ms.
—Three Halloween Oreos.
—Two squares of cheese pizza.
—Two cups of apple cider.
—One sliver of chocolate cake.
—A boatload of carrots, celery, and broccoli.

Right now my body is really upset with me. I can feel those non-PCP foods in my chest and my stomach and my arms and everywhere. They feel like sludge in my system. I'm sluggish and sleepy. I can't get the greasy, sugary, cloying feeling out of my mouth. I wish I had my veggies, yogurt, and eggs.

Unfortunately, there's another party to attend tonight. I'm suppose to take a break from the PCP Life for a day or two. I'm not sure that's going to happen. I can feel the PCP Life wanting to reassert itself and I don't know if I'm strong enough to prevent it from happening. I may need to succumb to it's siren song before long. I don't have that much willpower.

I guess this is perfect for Halloween. This is probably the most horrifying thing I've experienced in a long time!

Day 90: What's The Time? Zero Hour!

Sorry about that. Had to indulge my "superhero" fantasy. Making it all the way to Day 90 really has made me feel like those cartoon idols I worshiped as a kid. I feel so much better than the average person!

Amazingly enough, the next couple of days will be the challenge to my new found super skills—immediately coming off the PCP and being tossed directly into not one, not two, but THREE Halloween parties which will be totally loaded with all the non-PCP friendly foods you could think of. Yeah. This is going to be like the ultimate test.

Stay tuned, for this is not the end!

Day 89: Harder Faster Better Stronger [T-Minus 1]

I did it! I survived the super-set! Or maybe I should call it the super-duper-set! It's time for some silliness!!

I present to you a couple of videos with what could be a PCP anthem. The lyrics are:

Work it harder, make it better
Do it faster, makes us stronger
More than ever, hour after
Our work is never over.

First up is "Daft Hands":

And because there's always somebody out there who wants to take it to the next level, here's another variation complete with full body workout!

Day 88: It Takes Trust. It Takes Just A Bit More And We're Done. [T-Minus 2]

The super-sets just whipped my butt tonight—especially the "V-Sit/Plank" combination. On the upside, it takes me a bit longer to reach failure! Plus, there's no worry about me going to bed earlier tonight. I am exhausted!

Every weekday morning I receive a Note from the Universe. It's a nice little spiritual or motivation message that often makes me think and contemplate. It's a nice way to start the day as I'm trying to get geared up for work. But every so often a letter comes through that just seems extraordinarily appropriate.

Today's missive was one of those.

"People who live only for dessert, E, very rarely enjoy the main course. And sometimes a meal is like life. Bon appétit, The Universe."

I take a look around at a number of my friends and I can see it so clearly. They race around looking for instant gratification, not taking a moment to enjoy the world around them. They don't want the journey, they want to be at the destination. They don't want to work hard for something. They prefer that someone give it to them. Their creedo is "Life is short. Eat dessert first!" And when we get together, you can see that motto in full force.

I was like that until about a couple years ago. Then I started slowing my life down. I appreciate the stuff that I have, but I really don't need the newest and best things. If anything, I'm starting to pare down. I don't need to race here and there—this moment is just as special as the moment I arrive at wherever I'm going. Working hard for something is far better than someone giving it to you—you have more appreciation of it because you know exactly what it took to get or create it. And the dessert isn't more spectacular than the meal—the dessert isn't what's going to sustain you, the well-balanced meal is. Plus the dessert usually only has one flavor, sweet, whereas the meal has a multitude depending on the combination of the items.

Journeys are never easy. There may be some moments when things go quite well, but there's always other moments that are a complete struggle. However, the one side compliments the other. Everyone wants to have that "easy road" and they don't want to face the "rough path". Why not? I am quite certain that tougher route is going to give you far more stories to tell and a greater appreciation of what you accomplished than any fast lane to the big time.

A friend of mine complained today about going to the gym. "Why can't it be fun? Why does it always have to be work?" she moaned. I couldn't respond to her. She won't listen. She hasn't heard a word I've said to her all the time I've been on this program.

If it were fun, then everyone would in Peak Condition. But it's not. It's hard work. You have to sweat, and strain, and sacrifice, and sometimes slog through it—but in the end, the results are so worth it. "Fun" is what got you out of shape in the first place. That was the easy road. PCP is the rough path. I felt every one of those damn bumps, but by god I made it. It's an achievement to be proud of. I did it. No one waved their magic wand and made me healthier. I did it. And I've got some great stories. Some I've shared already, others are still on their way.

At the beginning I wasn't sure how I was going to accomplish this goal that I had set before me. There were just some days when it looked totally impossible. As I near the end of this journey, I look back and smile. It was one helluva ride, but damn it was fun!

Alright team—Amy, Anshu, Jess, Mike—I'm racing you to the finish line! I'll see you there!

Day 87: Contact! Let's Make Contact! 3-2-1 Contact! [T-Minus 3]

One of the questions that I'm often asked tends to be along the lines of "What are you going to do after your diet?" I don't know why, but this bugs me. I get the feeling that they want me to respond with something like, "Well, I'm going to dive head first into the largest ice cream sundae I can find, followed by a gazillion candy bars, and I'll top it all off with every bag of chips I can find."

That's probably why I shake them up a bit when I say, "What makes you think it's going to end?" They absolutely have no comeback for that.

When I began this journey, most of my social circle didn't get it. They hear the word "diet" and their minds immediately jump to those fads where you lose weight in 30 days and that's it—you're back to eating and living the way you were before.

There was one friend who got it. She never referred to PCP as a "diet". She had a better phrase. "How is your life plan going?"

That was exactly it. Peak Condition is a life plan. The program itself may run only 90 days, but it prepares you for a life a wellness long after Patrick and Chen and everything becomes a fond and distant memory.

When's the diet going to end? If you've honestly and truly committed yourself to this new lifestyle, it should never end. It will become part of you. It will be integrated into your life—healthy food and jump ropes and yes, even stupid planks. (Who knows, I may eventually grow to love planks. After all, look what happened with the jump rope!)

Have you been paying attention? Can you apply your knowledge to the situation? You better hope so. The ultimate test is in just a few days—re-entry into the real world!

Day 86: Its Been Six Whole Hours And Five Long Days For All Your Lies To Come Undone [T-Minus 4]

We interrupt this blog post with this brief announcement.

*Ahem*

OHMYGODREYNOLDS! WHATTHEHELLWEREYOUTHINKING? AREYOUTRYINGTOKILLME?!? NOONEINTHEIRRIGHTMINDSUPER-SETSFREAKIN'PLANKS!! THAT'SJUSTINSANE!!

And now we return you back to the regularly sceduled post.

Where was I? Oh yeah. Gyms.

I spent one year of my and a ton of money at one of those chain gyms. I eventually gave up about a month before I started Peak Condition. I just wasn't seeing any results despite going there religiously three evenings a week during the summer and fall and three mornings a week during the winter and spring. The only result I was seeing was my hard earned cash going down the drain.

During that stint I saw a lot of people there and many different kinds of habits. Here are some of the things I learned:

The only people who go to the gym in the early morning are business men. This is probably because they work every late in the evening. Otherwise, the gym is pretty empty. This was a good time to use the weightlifting machines.

Everyone else in the world goes to the gym right after work, between 5 and 6pm. This is a bad time to go. Wait until 7:00pm. The gym will be empty.

Regardless of the time of day you went, it was almost always difficult to get on a treadmill, a bicycle, or an eliptical machine. These are pretty much occupied by the overweight people. They will occupy the machine for almost an hour. Most will be reading a book or magazine.

The weightlifting section contains mostly the muscle-bound types. Especially the free-weights. This is the part of the gym where you will hear most of the grunting going on. For some reason, the ones that make the most noise are trying to lift weights that are far too heavy for them. These people are ususally there for at least two hours.

If you try to do a full routine involving both the cardio and weight sides, you will be looked upon as an intruder by each group. Never the twain shall meet.

Avoid the “healthful” snack bar at the gym, if there is one. After a workout you’re probably feeling a little peckish, and the gym makes it easy for “healthy food” to be nearby. Power Bars, protein bars, and the ever popular fruit smoothie is just around the corner. Amazingly enough, the calories are never listed and the drink size is large enough that it should be shared with a friend.

Don’t pay for a trainer. They are not worth the money—especially when four sessions with one of them costs more than two or three months of gym membership. You are also not the trainer’s only client. They will try and rush you through so they can have a few minutes to themselves before their next client arrives.

Avoid any special “weight-loss” program or challenge offered. This usually has its own cost on top of the gym membership. They love to take your money but fail on delivering the goods. (I’m still waiting for the t-shirt, party, and commerderie they promised.)

And the last observation is courtesy of a number of friends who also go to a gym.

No matter how much you work out, it all comes to naught if you don’t eat right. There’s a reason why I am looking good and have lost the same amount of weight in three months that it has taken you a year and a half to lose—my meals do not consist of carb loaded platters of fried foods, huge sugary desserts, and two or three large mugs of beer.

Hmmm. Maybe someday I’ll go back when I’m really ripped—so I can torture them! BWA-HA-HA-HA!

Day 85: It's The Final Countdown [T-Minus 5]

It was a busy, run around day, but I managed to do everything that was on my list!

I tried to get to the sporting goods store and the library before chorus practice. Unfortunately time wasn't on my side, so I had to chose one. The library won out (mainly because it would be closed by the time I got there after rehearsal).

Chorus ran for three hours. I flew from there to the sporting goods store to pick up a new resistance band, and was very surprised at the now limited selection they had. Back in August there was a whole wall of the things, but now only about a couple of racks. Very weird.

Then, on a whim, I went to a clothing store to try on some pants. All the stuff I have is now too big for me, so I wanted to see what size I was now (at least based on a manufacturer's measurements). I was surprised that I was able to fit into the smallest size men's pants there. They were still a little tight, but I'm sure that soon they'd be comfortable. Unfortunately I wasn't able to buy any (this was a non-paycheck week); however, it was just fun to try on stuff!

Afterwards, I went home and unpacked my new resistance band and did the exercises. It was the last day of the regular sets, so I had to enjoy them. Tomorrow starts the super-sets. Not looking forward to that.

The final countdown is on!